U R So Old Jokes

You are so old, when you were a kid rainbows were black and white
You are so old, you fart dust
You are so old, you sat next to Jesus in school
You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you too
You are so old, your birth-certificate expired

Your mama’s so old her memory is in black and white
Your mama’s so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals
Your mama’s so old her breasts squirt out powder milk
Your mama’s so old she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10

Your mama’s so old I looked in her year book and saw Jesus
Your mama’s so old I told her to act her age and she died
Your mama’s so old she babysat Cain and Abel
Your mama’s so old one of her pet dog was on on Noah’s Ark
Your mama’s so old her social security number is 1
Your mama’s so old she called the cops when David and Goliath got into a fight
Your mama’s so old she has hieroglyphics on her Driver license
Your mama’s so old she got the first copy of the Ten Commandments
Your mama’s so old her social security card is in roman numerals

Your mama’s so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince
Your mama’s so old she knew Captain Crunch while he was still a private
Your mama’s so old she recalls when the Grand Canyon was a ditch
Your mama’s so old she remembers what life was like before the ice age
Your mama’s so old she took her drivers test on a dinosaur
Your mama’s so old she went to an antiques auction and three people bid on her
Your mama’s so old she was a waitress at the last supper

Your mama’s So old she went blind from the big bang
Your mama’s so old she DJ’d at the Boston Tea Party
Your mama’s so old that when God said let there be light she hit the switch
Your mama’s so old that when she was in school there was no history class
Your mama’s so old vultures are constantly circling her house
Your mama’s so old when she ran the 100 meter dash they timed her with a sundial
Your mama’s so old you put her in a museum instead of in the nursing home


[unitegallery funnyoldpeople]

49,418 comments on “U R So Old Jokes”

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    47. The elements in california got after a while under
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